Autumn Song

The night was pouring rain the first time we ventured outside of the big city of Rome, many years ago. We’d arrived at our vacation rental house in a remote country setting in Monte Argentario, overlooking the Mediterranean, with our travel buddies Dave and Roxanne, but because of the rainstorm, the power was off in the house we were staying at. Darkness! Undaunted, we resourcefully managed to find everything we needed, and by candlelight we sat quietly enjoying the crackers and cheese we’d purchased at the big market along the way, before heading off to bed. It was kind of nice.

By late the next afternoon–with power restored– we were eager for a proper dinner, but strangely, restaurant after restaurant was closed. It was confusing. We concluded that perhaps it was seasonal– that restaurants in this part of the country had shut down during the quiet spring season. And yet when we drove 20 minutes to the nearest town of Porto Santo Stefano, we found the same thing– restaurants were all closed. 

Eventually having spotted someone moving about in one of them, we discovered that they would be open– but not until 7 p.m., which seemed unusually late. We assumed it was unique to this particular place, but we soon learned that this is common all over the authentic Italian towns, with the exception of the big cities like Rome, Naples, or Florence, or distinct high-traffic tourist towns. Commonly, restaurants in Italy don’t open for dinner until 7 p.m. 

So it is in our authentically Italian town of Citta della Pieve. Not surprisingly, when Dan and I go out for dinner– at 7 on the dot– we are almost exclusively the first to arrive into an empty place, but by the time we’re finished eating and finally ready to leave, the restaurant is crowded, at the apex of conversation, food, cheerful comradery, and loud, lively chatter. 

Eating together is definitely a social event. It is the evening entertainment in Italy and it lasts for hours, slowly, course after course. Dan and I are trying hard to break our Americanized “eat and run” habit, and I’m finding considerable comfort in returning to the European pattern of lingering meals that I grew up with in my Ukrainian family. Eating together establishes connections and grows relationships, vitally important in our current digital world.

In fact, lingering over conversation while eating together strongly characterized the New Testament church. It’s the way it’s supposed to be: “Breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people,”  Acts 2:46 tells us, among other places. I strongly suspect that these meals started late in the day after the work was all done, and often went far into the night, as it does in Italian culture.

This pattern is quite pleasant on hot summer days when meals in the heat of the day are cumbersome. There’s something very restful about gathering around a table in the cool of the evening, under lights. And, of course, the Italian culture is known for dining at tables outside, on the street. It’s fantastic!

To compensate for the lateness of the Italian dinner nights, the Italians regularly practice “il riposo”– an afternoon siesta. Shops, restaurants, pharmacies, markets all close from 1 p.m. until 4 p.m. The town literally shuts down and becomes blissfully quiet. 

Again, we learned of this custom early on. On that same initial trip to Italy with our friends Dave and Roxanne, we arrived for the first time in the beautiful medieval hilltop city of Orvieto just after noon. Roxanne was in need of a beauty shop to find a curling iron, which she’d accidentally forgotten to pack. After searching, we were excited to finally find one… just as the shopkeeper was locking up the door for il riposo! As it turned out, she was kind enough to reopen her shop to help us out, but other shopkeepers are not so yielding. Some, I’ve found, are quite firm.

Initially, it was an inconvenience for me to realize that all the shops in our town closed for the afternoons, but I quickly learned to not only adjust, but to deeply appreciate this blessed time of peace and quiet. To escape the constant and perpetual busyness of our current American culture, an afternoon riposo has become a great and welcome pattern for me, even when I’m back in America– a forced time of rest and refreshment, of slowing down and reestablishing calm.

In the heat of summer, it’s pure bliss. Even in seasons when afternoons are not so hot, taking a break in the middle of the day has created a more peaceful means of savoring life. 

Slow down…unwind…relax…enjoy life. The Italians do this oh so well.